I Looked the Other Way

Just because you know what a sound is
doesn’t mean you can stop it. I tried
to play the recorder in fifth grade—
a failed experiment in music. Just because
your mom buys you an instrument doesn’t mean
you can play it. I bought an electric guitar
for a husband, and they can play it, but they have to
ask first. Just because I can lie doesn’t mean I can’t
tell the truth too. Like I love you. I’m doing my best.
It’s just allergies, even though it’s sadness again. Like
I feel bad living in a house. I need more space or less
noise. I could make noise back. Maybe I could make it
louder than the other noise, but it keeps coming back
like a horror monster. Because we sold the waterbed,
it feels like I’m sleeping on a bed. I tried to imagine
I was asleep in the sound.

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